… Or “Ghosts of Girlfriends and past relationships!” [pt.2]
I’m now about to turn 19, starting college, and becoming perfectly happy in being single, at least on the surface, if not somewhat deep down.
By and large, I was both excited, and pretty pissed, I mean I HATED school pretty much my whole life, I didn’t want four more years or two more years, or hell even one more week of academics, I wanted a job, a band, and a crap load more freedom then I currently enjoyed.
But my parents didn’t really give me a choice in the matter, and they had bought an extra car for me to drive, so I figured “whatever, why not?”
That brings me to a hand full of people and relationships:
Johnny
Christina
Jason
Susanna
Susan
Okay, so now I should give the quick n dirty version due to the amount of ground I have to cover, and I will expand into detail as I feel is needed, also if I do not exactly follow the order I laid out above, sorry if it confuses you, but do try and keep up kiddoz’.
Johnny, I had met him almost two years prior to starting college, at a kids church camp, where we both where counselors for our respective churches, watching over a bunch of 5 to seven year olds for four days.
When we met again in college, we hit it off pretty quick, talking about music movies and church and such things, and I felt that I had found someone who could be a good friend to me, something that I felt I needed, and that my mother had been praying and hoping for me since I was 5.
Christina, it was Johnny who had introduced us, and it was his suggestion that we would be good friends because of our mutual love of music, and he was right. However it was Christina and I who would become close and dear friends, not Johnny and I. But within the first nine months of my being in school, I could detect hints of jealousy in Johnny, which at the time, I foolishly dismissed as simply his interest in Christina, clashing with my own interest. Oh how right, and yet wrong I was.
Christina wasn’t the prettiest girl I’d ever met, but she was hardly ugly, still the biggest attraction I had to her was in fact her love of music, and her incredible voice, and it was likely these traits that I enjoyed the most, as well as her honesty and sense of humor, all of which culminated into me having an ever growing love and respect for her, but let me be totally frank here; yes, I did have a small crush on her, no I never legitimately perused it, ever, even when given the chance to do so.
Jason, he was dating Christina at the time I met her, and very shortly afterwards I met Jason, who was, and still is, likely one of the smartest, and thoughtful persons I have ever had the chance to meet. And I don’t exactly mean thoughtful in so far as being kind, although he is far from being a jerk, but thoughtful, in the mental or intellectual meaning.
I have incredible respect for him and his intellect, his personality and his god-given insight wisdom, and need to learn. If only everyone had the natural curiosity and basic reasoning skills he did, I honestly feel the world would be a MUCH better place, also the fact that he is likely the biggest Sci-Fi Nerd I’ve met in my life, just saying that makes me smile, because I can picture hover-craft, light sabers and phasers being a real thing already if the above was true. XD
Susanna, oh Suzy Q what to say about you? A cutie, a beauty, and a talented girl all around, Susanna had a sweet soft voice clear like a bell, and full of more soul then any two other people I’ve met to date, with a few possible exceptions, and she had a sweet and playful personality, and wouldn’t hurt a fly. She and I where like brother and sister for a while, and it was a good time, being close with her, Christina and Jason, was likely one of the highest points in my life.
Susan, almost ironically was physically, at least, a match for Susanna, Indian, (Asian not American) short, and CURVACEOUS, with wonderful large full breasts, a narrow slender torso, and nice tight, yet slightly wide hips that flowed into an epically shaped backside and lean strong legs, and LONG smooth black hair with the slightest wave to it.
Hot shit? Try hot holy shit.
Take a nice curvy super model, and shrink her down to about five feet four or five, make her a tick over a hundred pounds, and that was Susan, who also had the deepest most lovely dark brown eyes ever.
She was my classmate in US Government my 3rd semester, and after the first 6 weeks, we where real good friends, and by the end of my second fall in school, we where dating.
The REASON we where dated however, and the reason I never told anyone else about her, was because… I popped her cherry…
Long story short, her then boyfriend, had been pushing for sex, and she wanted to wait, and didn’t feel fully comfortable about it, and finally he dumped her, and he wasn’t nice about it either, he made her cry and feel worthless.
My whole family was out for the night and I’d secretly bought a six-pack of beer and rented Spider-man 2 and was enjoying myself being home alone, when she drove over to where I lived, crying like her world was over and needing a friend, and I could never say no to Susan, (or pretty much any girl it seems) and so I let her cry her eyes out on my shoulder, knock back three beers on her own, and watch the movie with me.
Well, by the end of the movie, we had kissed a few times, and she was pretty tipsy, and I knew than my parents would be back around one thirty or two in the morning, and my sibs back much later, and so I knew that it being barely ten, there was time for her to sober up.
Oh she sobered up alright, after about three hours worth of making out, and having sex…
The thing that really got to me, was that, when she stood on the dingy porch of my family’s humble oddity in the center of lower middle-class suburbia, her eyes big and deep, the innocence gone from their depths, she kissed my cheek softly, and squeezed my neck while whispering into my ear; “I always wanted it to be with someone I trusted… Thank you.”
Of course, her being a good girl, and me being the (sudo) old school gentleman, we started dating right then and there, and for the next nine months, we where alright, but… Her dad didn’t like the fact that I was so blue collar, and they where so not.
He shipped her off to a school Iowa, and she didn’t fight it at all, so we broke up, with a little more than a whimper, and a quick kiss good bye.
She was barely 19, and I’d been 21 for almost six months when it was all over.
While she was almost totally an accidental romance, she was also the first girl I had truly cared about, enough to try and make it work, but she was also the kind of person that lived almost totally in the moment. I was not.
Right after that, I decided that I should just worry about myself, my music, my friends and school, so that’s what I did, I puttered along, just readjusting to being me, and rolling along the college path, trying to figure out just what exactly I wanted to do for the rest of my life, and as such, what degree I needed to work on, and I was pretty clueless until I found out about the Audio Production degree plan.
It was about that time that I was really getting into online Roll Play, something I’d fallen into quite by accident, while looking for some fun way to burn up my free time both on campus and at home, when I found web site that was based around one of my all time favorite TV shows, Teen Titans. And for me, the center of the universe for that, was Proboards, a web service that hosted web-based bulletin boards, catering to everything from discussion and advice forums, to news, information sites, fan listings, and yes, of course turn based Roll Play…
[Concluded in pt. 3]
